Choosing Your Bridal Party
Okay, ladies, now let’s get in formation…
We have yet to confirm this theory with Queen B herself, but we think Beyonce just might have come up with this line when she and her bridesmaid were getting ready to walk down the aisle. (@Beyonce, have your people call our people.)
Because while the flowers + place settings + ceremony are fun to plan, the most important aspect of your big day is who you share it with.
However, this can be one of the toughest decisions you’ll make through the whole planning process. The good news? Once you pick out your bridal party, they will be able to help with all of the other hard decisions moving forward! But what about this decision? Don’t fret, beautiful (soon-to-be) brides, we’ll help you out with this one!
YES, YES, YES!
We all know that a bride’s tribe typically consists of the her closest friends + family. However, this doesn’t mean that you need to ask all of your best buds. Yes, you want to spend the day with your loved ones, but you also want to choose a crew that will make the planning process + the wedding day even more enjoyable, not less!
Questions to ask yourself about potential bridesmaids...
Is she someone who has witnessed + been there for important parts of your life?
Is she someone who has been supportive of your relationship? Does she genuinely care about you + your fiance?
Will she help you through the planning? (This doesn’t mean she has to be a planner per se, but is she a good listener, willing to help with tasks, organized, etc.)
Will she provide emotional support?
Will she keep things fun?
Will she be excited to be in your wedding party?
Will she be excited to attend and/or host showers + other parties?
If someone gets a “yes” for all of the above questions, she will most likely be a great bridesmaid and we can pretty much promise you won’t regret having her by your side throughout the entire process!
Unfortunately, not everyone would get a “yes” for every question above, and having toxic bridesmaids can put a huge damper on your day. So although it’s not fun to admit, you may be hurting yourself in the long run if you include a select friend or two in all the wedding prep.
Who exactly should you be vary of?
Friends who tends to steal the spotlight
High drama friends
Friends who don’t like your fiance
At the end of the day, it’s your wedding, and you deserve to surround yourself with those who will shower you with love + affection + support.
THE MORE THE PRICIER
You can’t put a price on good friends + great family. Unfortunately, you can put a price on including each one in your big day!
This is something most brides don’t think about when planning their bridal party, but it can do some serious damage on your budget if you aren’t careful.
Think about it… each bridesmaid will need a dress. And then she’ll need a beautiful bouquet to complement that dress. And unless she’s Adriana Lima or Candice Swanepoel, she’ll probably be like, “Uhh, yes please” for hair + make-up. And then you’ll want to get her a gift to thank her for all of her help.
Remember that children’s book If You Give a Mouse a Cookie? Well, this edition is called If You Ask Another Bridesmaid.
Now we’re definitely not saying that you shouldn’t ask someone just for the sake of saving money. We are, however, saying that this is something to be mindful of.
NOT TRADITIONAL? NOT A PROBLEM!
We love incorporating traditional trends in our weddings. We also LOVE when our couples decide to go outside the box and make their wedding day something unique + unexpected + totally “them”!
So don’t feel like you have to have a bridal party at all! You can still ask some friends + family to hang out with you on the big day for both support + some added fun, but they don’t have to be labeled as bridesmaids.
Another idea that we think is overdue for an update? The idea that a bridal party has to consist of only girls. We think it’s so cool when a bride has her best girls and her best guys standing next to her on the big day!
Also, who ever decided that there has to be an even number of bridesmaids and groomsmen? Because we think that really isn’t a big deal at all! We say ask whoever you want + don’t worry about numbers.
The biggest thing to remember when selecting your bridal party is that this is ultimately you + your fiance’s day. If you want to ask someone to stand by your side, by all means do so! If you feel like you should ask someone to stand by your side, then maybe you’d be including them for the wrong reason.
And let’s be honest, every. single. person. that shows up at your wedding will already be playing a huge role in your wedding- helping you celebrate! So don’t get too stressed about who will be standing where and just do whatever will make you happy.
The Love Letter Weddings Team